Get A Post-It

I drive a German-made car. I won’t say what kind it is, but let’s just say it contains four letters, and begins with an “A” and ends with an “i.”

I love my car. The problem is, she does not love me back. What do I mean? Well, in a year’s time, I have taken her into the dealership for one problem or another 23 times. I have been there 23 times, and been on the phone with the dealership many more times than that. I know the people who work there by name. I know about their wives and kids, I’ve seen them get promoted, they knew when I lost my job, etc. It’s not their fault that my car is problematic, but after 23 attempts at trying to get her fixed, I’m a little over it. I’ve been sweet and friendly 23 times, but when another light popped on in my car, I decided that it was time for a different approach.

So last week, after spending 30 minutes on the phone with a customer care representative (explaining to my girl Tamara that I didn’t feel like I was getting much customer care at all), she made a phone call to the dealership and told them that my car needed to be tested for issues, and the tests should then be reviewed by a factory representative. Issues? I was a little insulted, but whatever.

Today, I took my car into the dealership (where I’m convinced that they are polite because they have to be but really hate me) and left it for the “testing of issues.” To my surprise, they offered me a loaner car – this has never happened before – so I gratefully took my VW Beetle and drove it on to work. After work, I drove 20 minutes to the dealership to pick up my problem child and hear what her diagnosis was. Only when I got there, I saw the look on Brian’s face…the look of “uh oh” was written all over him.

Uh oh, we forgot to call you and tell you that your car is going to be here longer than we thought. We forgot to tell you that we don’t have the proper equipment to test your car, and we will need to keep it overnight and all day tomorrow. Also, the factory rep couldn’t make it here today, but he’ll be back on the 25th and can talk to you then. Would you like to keep the loaner car overnight, or can someone come pick you up?

Blood pressure. Through. The. Roof.

This was my response, as best I can remember: “You forgot? Ok, I’m going to make a small suggestion, and please, don’t take this the wrong way Brian, because I like you. But. GET a POST IT. And, no, no one can pick me up. My family lives an hour from here, and seeing as how you close in about 5 minutes, I don’t think that is enough time for them to get here. Unless you are suggesting that I stand outside in the cold. Is that what you’re suggesting? (Brian says, “no ma’am.”) Well then, I will be keeping that car (I pointed, for dramatic effect) overnight.”

I then proceeded to have one of the most boring conversations of my life with the service manager, who talked about oil consumption, scales, turbo and something to do with rings. Hey, I payed attention through “turbo” – what do you want from me? He apologized for the lack of communication and told me I’d have my car, and some answers, back tomorrow. I’m kind of hoping the answer will be, “We are so sorry for the year and a half long inconvenience – here’s a new one” but probably not.