The Age Gap

26 Oct

Age. It’s only a number, right? Wrong.

As someone who is clinging on to 29 by her fingernails, I can tell you that the number matters. I used to think 30 was old…and now, well, I changed my mind. It’s not “old” – it’s older. Than 21. Than 23. Than 25. And thankgoodness for that. I don’t know about you, but I wouldn’t go back to my early to mid-twenties even if I could. I was self-absorbed (yes, even more than I currently am) and self-conscious. I drank too much (you didn’t read that, mom). I was reckless and judgmental. I thought I knew it all.

Boy was I wrong. But, hey, that’s what your twenties are for. They’re for finding out what you want to be, who you want to be and where you want to go. By the end of them, like magic, you’ve figured a lot of stuff out. Not everything, mind you, just a few things. You also realize that all of a sudden, you’ve matured. Against your will, mostly, but matured nonetheless. How? For example, now I rarely see 11:30pm during the work week. I used to watch David Letterman every night. Now, I save money for “house” or “car” emergencies. I used to shop for clothes. A lot.

My latest theory is that your twenties are made up of categories. They are: 20-23, 24-26, 27-29. As long as you “hang out” with the people in your category, you don’t see much difference in the numbers. But, if you start hanging around people below the age category you’re in, and you are bound to experience The Age Gap.

The Age Gap occurs when you’re talking about something and someone younger than you doesn’t “get it.” (Otherwise known as an uncomfortable reminder that you’re the old one.) This weekend, for example, I was around some wonderful younger ladies who were discussing boy bands. I, naturally, talked about the two New Kids On The Block concerts I attended in elementary school. Them? Well, they talked about seeing the BackStreet Boys and 98 Degrees. Yikes – I was in college then. I recalled sneaking in my room (because my dad didn’t approve) and watching the original 90210 episodes. Them? They had only seen the re-runs on FX. That, my friends, is The Age Gap.

I decided I’ll be hanging out with older people this weekend. Like at a nursing home or something.

3 Responses to “The Age Gap”

  1. Ben October 27, 2009 at 9:10 pm #

    Age only matters if you are cheese.

  2. Mandi October 28, 2009 at 2:48 pm #

    Any food product.

  3. Charles Apple October 28, 2009 at 6:09 pm #

    You're wise beyond your years, Mandi….Which, come to think of it, was probably the last thing you wanted to hear.:)

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