Speaking Of Breakups

8 Jul

Exes. Love ’em or hate ’em? That is the question.

Confession: I’m a lover of the exes.

I happen to be friends (or friendly, that’s a better description) with almost all of my ex-boyfriends and that one “other ex” I have. I mean, we don’t hang out and watch movies together or anything, but we’re polite and we keep in touch. It might not be right for everyone, but it’s kind of just who I am. Once I love you – I love you. (Does that make me loyal or clingy? Let’s go with loyal. Like a Labrador Retriever.)

There’s only one ex that I’d avoid like the plague if I saw him somewhere. Why? Because he hates me. He hates me like Bill O’Reilly hates Keith Olbermann, and a lot like that duo, there will never be a kiss-and-makeup moment with us. (But, hey, 1 out of 50 ain’t bad. Ok, I don’t really have 50 ex-boyfriends, but it feels like that sometimes.)

The most common question I get regarding my divorce is, “Why didn’t your marriage work out?” But, the second most asked question is, “Do you still talk to him?”

The first answer is complicated and intrusive, and I’ll never answer it on this blog – or to anyone whom I don’t know extremely well. He did not do everything wrong and I did not do everything right…I’ll leave it at that. The answer to the second question is yes. I am not entirely sure I will still have conversations with him when I’m 32, or 35, or 45 – but for now, we still occasionally catch up on each other’s lives.

So there you have it. I, friends, am a lover of the exes. You can praise it or despise it, but life’s too short to go around wasting time and energy hating people, and so…I don’t.

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2 Responses to “Speaking Of Breakups”

  1. Bess July 9, 2010 at 8:01 pm #

    That's so sweet Mandi! I feel the same way–Tem is one of my most treasured friends and "my other kind of ex" and I left on good terms too…

  2. Mandi July 16, 2010 at 6:25 pm #

    Bess – I'm glad someone else "loves" the exes. Most people look at me like I've lost my mind!

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