I am often told that I look exactly like somebody’s sister, cousin, colleague, high school friend, etc. I get it so much, in fact, that it leads me to believe I look totally unoriginal. I’m ok with this, really. I’d rather be the “girl next door” than this girl, I think. (I can’t decide if she’s pretty or unfortunate looking.)

Anyway, the whole “You look exactly like ___” thing often causes people to stare at me in public and then apologize for staring at me. Case in point: Yesterday while dining with Cecilia.

Whilst having an adult beverage together (and waiting on our food to arrive) our table was approached by an older man who was on a mission. Apparently, according to said older man, I look identical to the Sheriff’s wife. In his words, “You could be her twin.”

Great. Now I’m going to have to watch my language/cocktail consumption even more so when out and about in this town. I could get that poor woman in all sorts of trouble.

I was telling Ben this weekend that I remember living in Columbia and being completely bored out of my mind after the workday was over. Like, I had a super unhealthy television addiction and obsession with the public library going on. Could we go back to that, please?

How do women who have families and careers do it? My grandmother did it. My mother did it. My aunts did it. My friends do it. Surely I could do it…right? Well, I’m not so certain.

Managing work, social activities and volunteer activities is hard enough for me. Throw in the dog, the house and searching for a car – and I’m spent. If I had another “being” to take care of, one of us wouldn’t make it.

I was having one of those “I’ve Come A Long Way, Baby” days:

• “Gratitude” from Monday, June 15, 2009

Bless his heart:

• “Am I Traveling With An Alien?” from Wednesday, December 16, 2009

When I realized that I was out of the “new relationship” phase…

• “The Honeymoon Is Over” from Thursday, February 4, 2010

When the termite man insulted me…

• “Can’t You Just Check For Termites And Leave?” from Thursday, April 1, 2010

Long before there were “Status Update Gems” on this blog, there was this:

• “Shut the Hell Up, Please” from Friday, June 19, 2009

The first one was actually called “A Plea” but it began my “A Letter” posts. I had evidently seen a Girls Gone Wild Commercial (What the heck was I watching?) and felt the need to vent.

• “A Plea” from Thursday, July 31, 2008

Remember when Miss California opened her mouth and stupidity came out?

• “A Letter” from Tuesday, April 29, 2009

My letter to Comcast Cable. The Bravo Channel appeared a few weeks later. I’m not saying I’m the reason, but I’m just sayin’.

• “A Letter” from Wednesday, June 17, 2009

I began this blog two years ago. In two years time, a lot has changed – and not just for me, for everyone – that’s just how life works.

Two years ago I was living in a small town (again) and my commute to work was over an hour each way. Now, I’m living in a bigger town (the second largest and second oldest in Georgia, thank you very much) and my commute to work is exactly 8 minutes each way. A bit longer if I get stuck by a train.

Two years ago I wasn’t very happy with the “life choices” I was making. I couldn’t be happier with the ones I’m making now.

Two years ago I worried a lot about what other people thought. I worried a lot in general. I wasn’t sure where my life was headed or what “my plan” was. Now I know that you make “plans” and God laughs – things usually fall into place the way they are supposed to.

Two years ago I wanted an outlet. I started this blog nervously, wondering if I should send the link out to my family and friends or just keep it to myself. Now, I usually begin my conversations with, “If you read this on my blog, just tell me and I won’t repeat it.” (Not only do I invite my family and friends to read it, I expect them to – how arrogant, right?) And, I have readers all over this country…and in others, too. That’s a very cool feeling, y’all. It means the absolute world to me.

If you wander over to my neck of the internet every now and again, or every day, or only have this one time – I hope that my little blog has entertained you – at least for a minute or two. I hope to have made you laugh, or reminded you of a fond memory (or bad outfit) you had forgotten about. Thank you for your readership, your comments and for allowing me to share my words and thoughts with you.

My cup runneth over.

This week, in honor of my blogversary (and the fact that I’m super-duper short on time), I will be reposting some of my favorite entries.

About children:

• Blank is ready for ____’s umbilical cord stump to fall off so she can have a real bath!!!
• Blank was bathing ____ and she pooped in the tub…and then threw a piece out on the floor…super GROSS!!!!
• Blank thinks there is nothing like being woken up by the sound of ____ blowing out a stinky. She makes stink then gets fussy at me because I woke her up changing her. Lol.
• Blank can’t believe her youngest put a booger on his bible school teacher today!
• Blank man I’m sure gonna hate to change ____’s diaper, she’s eaten a ton of kielbasa sausage.

On sporting events:

• Blank When I was born, I felt special. When I graduated, I felt blessed. When I lost my virginity I felt lucky. When the Gamecocks won the CWS I saw that bird do a backflip in my dreams…Go Gamecocks!
• Blank just like a wet dream I never want the World Cup to be over.

I went to a strip club once (ok, that’s a lie – I’ve been twice) with a group of guys I’ve known my whole life. I was trying to be that girl who was “cool” with it – you know, unfazed by nudity and by being the only chick in the group. I did a pretty good job with it until I realized that that one other strip club I had visited was in South Carolina. The land of the g-string. Georgia is the land of the free, if you know what I mean. Upon this quite startling realization, I stumbled into one of my guy friends and stammered that we needed to leave.

So much for the “cool” girl.

Don’t get me wrong, it was impressive. Some of them could even pick up a dollar with their…you know-what. Congratulations on that, but no thank you.

Mel Gibson. What an a**hole. (Sorry, mama, but he is.) If you guys haven’t listened to his phone calls with his ex-girlfriend (and mother of his child), you can do so here. Just don’t do it at work because he doesn’t hold back.

Levi Johnston. Way to stick it to the Palins yet again. Secretly seeing their daughter and asking her to marry you…well played, Levi.