Inappropriate Status Update Gems

18 Sep

Status updates. Love ’em or hate ’em, at least they give us something to ridicule. My friends and I do this often by copying and pasting them to each other while on gchat. The other day, we had a collective thought (dangerous): We should compile them for the world to see.

Enter my blog. (And by “world,” we meant our other friends.)

So, without further ado, I bring you the first edition of Inappropriate Status Update Gems:
(Names have been left off on purpose, to protect the innocent…and to keep me out of lawsuits.)

  • Blank is divorcing (BUT THANK GOD I’M DIVORCING!!!!) the BIGGEST ASSHOLE EVER!!! one day i’ll be on top again……and i’ll laugh in your face when you come to me. prick.
  • Blank wants to know if anyone could recommend a good gynecologist.
  • Blank’s little one just did a big stinky. Shoo-wee it smells!
  • Blank is Damn i hurt today..on the way to the doc after i figure out how to wrap my arm by myself so i can try to shower…taking more dead skin off today..not looking forward to it at all..ever seen a grown man cry?
  • Blank is constipated. Any home remedy suggestions?
  • Blank is ready to give birth already!!!
  • Blank had a crazy dream last night about a midget in a red thong. I guess me watching Jerry Springer before bed has got to stop.

It is worth noting that this was a collaborative effort. I don’t have the friend list from hell or anything.

4 Responses to “Inappropriate Status Update Gems”

  1. Beth September 21, 2009 at 12:52 pm #

    I could so add some to these – WTH are some people thinking?????

  2. Ben September 21, 2009 at 2:50 pm #

    Anonymous: Monday again? The weekends sure don't last long enough. Had a great time with the wife this weekend!I love you Jodi!This chaps statuses are always bad. The people I went to high school with have the worst status updates ever. I always feel better after reading these horrible things.

  3. Anonymous September 21, 2009 at 8:06 pm #

    People give TMI on Facebook. Seems like every one has become self obsessed. Look at me!!! Look at me!

  4. Carissa September 24, 2009 at 8:29 pm #

    here is a page full of consistently updated gems someone sent to me:

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