Happy Halloween from Wallace! My humiliated, (but oh so cute) clown-dog. (He drew the line at wearing the red nose. He put it in his mouth and ran from me.)

Let me ask you a question (and it won’t apply to you “big city” folks, so I apologize): Let’s say you’re in the grocery store and you run into someone you know. You speak to one another, and go about your shopping. How awkward is it when you keep running into them during that same shopping trip? Is it just me, or do you feel like you have to say a little something each time? I try to make the awkward feeling better by saying things like “Just grabbing some coffee. Gotta have that!” or “Love these pre-mixed salads!”

Next time it happens, I’m hiding out in the magazine aisle until they leave. At least I’ll be all caught up on “Diet Secrets of the Stars.”

A few random things:

• That “news story” about the guy who collects his belly button lint in a jar makes me ill.
• So, Taylor Swift wrote a song about John Mayer? Who cares? I’m so over people talking about this on the radio, on E!, in person and on Facebook. Is it really a news flash that he’s a playa, playa?
• I know I don’t have a baby, but if I did, this is what it would wear for Halloween. (My dog Wallace is going to be a clown, but only because I couldn’t find a chicken costume.)
• Speaking of Halloween…want free pumpkin carving stencils? Here you go!

A while back, I posted about some good news I received. That news was made public today, and I’m bursting with pride. I’m proud of the city officials involved, proud of the people who made donations, wrote letters or helped the cause in any way – large or small.

At the end of March, a friend of mine was killed on his motorcycle when a driver made a u-turn in a ridiculous place to make a u-turn. A Facebook page was started a few days later, with the goal of organizing a memorial ride to raise awareness about motorcycle safety – and to raise money to go towards efforts of getting a barrier placed where the u-turn occurred.

Well, 900 Facebook fans, one memorial ride, and lots of calls and letters to elected officials later…and the goal has been achieved. And, we even get to donate the money raised to charity.

Today is a good day. A day that reminds me that if you believe in something enough, stay dedicated (and are persistent as all-get-out), you might just change a few things that need changing.

If you are lucky enough to not know someone who is (or has been) in an unhappy relationship, I need to come live on the planet you’re on. Maybe it’s because I’m a known relationship failure (that sounded a lot more harsh than I meant for it to), but people talk to me all the time about their relationship woes. And, while no relationship between two people will ever be perfect, sometimes we all need to stop talking about why we’re unhappy and start doing something about it.

A few years ago, it took me a long time to come to that simple realization. To stop talking, thinking, wishing, hoping…and to start doing something about my unhappiness. (And about our unhappiness as a couple.) For me, working with a therapist helped. (Hey, this post is full of honesty, remember?) Having someone other than the well-meaning and supportive, but totally biased people in my life to talk to was key. I worked through the sadness, the guilt, the disappointment – and moved in the direction that was right for me. A direction that was right for both of us.

If you can relate to this post at all (I’m hoping that most of you can’t), your direction may be different than the one I chose. What’s important is that you’re honest with yourself, and that you have a direction towards happiness.

“Why does anyone stay in an unhappy relationship? Because people do. They do it all the time. And the truth is, when you’re in it, when you’re up to your neck in the everyday part of life with another human being, sometimes you don’t exactly notice how bad things really are. It’s not always as apparent as it would seem. Unhappiness, when it involves another person, can be like that line from The Sun Also Rises about going bankrupt, how it happens two ways: gradually, and then suddenly.”

— Sarah Dunn (The Big Love)

My “placement” in the Junior League (don’t you dare make a gagging noise) involves our new members. We train them on how to be the best little volunteers they can be during our monthly meetings. My friend Cecilia does, rather. I get to come up with fun ways for them to get to know each other. My placement kicks her placement’s a**.

Here are the questions I got them to answer last week, with my answers filled in. (Because it’s Monday, and I got nothin’ else, y’all.)

*Click on the image to enlarge it.

I went to lunch with some of my amazing peers today. And, naturally, after hours of being professional and productive (at work), we were tired of all that.

We discussed weekend plans, recent trips, working out and hair stylists. Then, our conversation took an unexpected, but totally interesting turn: Dating Before Facebook. (DBF, if you will.)

Does anyone remember how nice it was to go out with someone before Facebook existed? You know, when you actually took the time to get to know the person before you made a judgment about them? Now, all it takes is one click for us to say, “Oh my gosh, he’s friends with that guy? This isn’t a good sign.” Or, “Who’s that girl tagged in the photo with him? Is that his ex? Or a friend? Or both?” (Followed by the clicking on said tagged photo, only to find that her profile is private. Damnit.)

Even if you’re lucky enough to not find anything suspect on his Facebook profile at first glance, what about after? For example, let’s say you’ve moved into a more serious phase of the relationship (known as “going steady” to my dad) and you notice someone of the opposite sex who keeps posting on his wall, or commenting on his pictures, or “liking” every darn thing he says? You don’t want to seem paranoid, but after a certain point, you just can’t help yourself. Two and a half glasses of red in and you’re asking, “Who is that annoying girl on Facebook?” It can’t go anywhere but down from there, folks.

Thanks for making modern day dating even more difficult, Facebook. That’s just what us single gals needed.

Via Blackberry Messenger
Me: Pardon the late night interruption, but Vanilla Ice has a show on HGTV?
Ginny: I saw the promo.
Me: I mean, I feel like someone at that network has a big ole sense of humor.
Ginny: I guess at least he’s doing something productive, which is not what I would have predicted.
Me: Yes, I agree. Although the firearm on his t-shirt is a little concerning.

HGTV, really? I would expect this from E! or Bravo, but I thought you were above it. If MC Hammer gets a show about home improvements, I’ll dvr House Hunters no more.

My mama, bless her heart, is totally and completely addicted to eBay. What’s her drug of choice? Smocked dresses.

There isn’t a children’s clothing line that exists that my mother doesn’t know about/bid on. She’s out of control, y’all. Out. Of. Control.

Exhibit A, a text message from my mom:
6:05am: I AM WINNING! May stay home from work so I won’t get outbid.

Exhibit B, while I was watching television at her house:
Mom: 10 SECONDS! 10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1! Did I? Yesssssss!!! It’s MINE!!!!! I WON!!!!!!!!
Me: Good lord, this isn’t Vegas.
Mom: Oh, shoot! It’s not her size. It’s for a 5-year-old.

My niece isn’t quite 3 months old, let alone 5 years old. And, like any junkie, my mom hides “the evidence” from my stepdad. Which is pretty hard to do, considering he delivers mail for a living. But, some way, somehow, she sneaks dress after dress into the house…and into my old closet. MY old closet.

I knew this niece was trouble.

Forgiveness – the process of ceasing to feel resentment, indignation or anger against another person for a perceived offense, difference or mistake, or ceasing to demand punishment or restitution.

So, the act of forgiveness. It’s not always a piece of cake, right? It can be difficult, and at times can seem about as possible as winning the lottery. In my experience, though, letting go of resentment and anger is an absolute must. I am not myself (or my best self, I should say) with those feelings festering inside of me. It should not come as a surprise to anyone who’s breathing that there are studies that show people who forgive are healthier and happier than those who do not. (If you doubt me, just use your ole friend Mr. Google to find out.)

I am baffled by people who can’t forgive one another. Family members who don’t speak to each other, friends who abandon one another, strangers who are unkind to one another because of different backgrounds, race, religion, sexual orientation, etc. It’s all a bunch of bullshit if you ask me.

I’ve been hurt by people whom I never thought would hurt me, betrayed by people I never thought would be anything but loyal, and yet – I’ve forgiven all of them. (I certainly don’t deserve a “gold star” for it, but I’ve done it, and I’m proud of it.) Because if this were my last day on earth, I’d want no part of resentment or indignation. I’ll take happy and healthy, thank you very much.